Wednesday, July 14, 2010

i'm a auntie guys!!! :)

ok so basically like sunday which was... june 11, 2010-- my best friend since we was 12 had her beautiful gorgeous baby boy named anthony dre'mond carter & so ever since then i been soooo baby struck or whatever you wanna call it.  i just been real super gushy like with all things concerning life & love & mistakes & blessings &... but i digress.  i'm just sooo in love with my new nephew yall like he's the shiiiii by default ya feel me.  he got nothin but greatness all up & thru him.  he was 7 lbs 2 oz i believe & 19 inches long, not too tall but he got quick lil legs  like his mommy so i know he's gonna be a hurdler just like we were back in the day :)
#sigh... it just makes me see my bestie in a whole other light ya know? like...
they say havin a baby doesn't make you a man but... after 8 years of bestFriendship & 9 months of watching her carry little anthony, i finally saw her as a mother when she held that baby boy. & here i go rambling again but dag! i'm just proud of my best friend & the wonderful mother she is & will continue to be <3

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

July Second-- a chopped & screwed "sijo"

this here is the second poem in the July series.
p.s. a sijo is actually a 3 lined poem where each line varies between 14-16 syllables but in english, sijos usually run at 6 lines. either way i breaks rules suckuh. stop frontin- it's nehhthin lol #dontjudgeme

so i met this boy.

heartbeat like thunder, eyes like lightning & the color of morning rain

--he's the perfect storm

his smile harnesses my breath like strong winds

& i just want to stand in the eye of our tornado

p.p.s. i'm mos def gonna continue this one, i #lowkey like where it's going :P

Monday, July 5, 2010

poems under construction...

1. Aiyana Jones-- google her
2. "do not ask of those who constantly take from you..."
3. My Next Boyfriend or Dear Future Boyfriend
4. Fractional Love
5. AdDICKted-- about a girl looking for love in all the wrong places...
6. Land of the Kings
7. Sam's poem-- physical manifestations of emotional needs...
8. Just Like His Father
9. Poem for Anthony, My Future Nephew <3 -- he'll be here any day now :)


ok so anybody that knows me knows that i'm on lauryn hill's balls somethin MAJOR.  & i don't give a ffffffffffff lol like i just really got mad love for that girl slash grown woman, defend her to the death & err'thang lol but on some real ish, she has to be literally one of THEEE greatest artists of all time, dispute me if you want-- she was and still is the realest female to ever do it: she spits AND she sings for one. and not just sings, she #SANGS bro. and she don't just spit, she actually HAS SOMETHING TO SAY. everytime i listen to that girl, i hear something relevant to my life & that's saying something phenomenal seeing as how she ain't put nothing out in a good decade & some change
the miseducation of lauryn hill was the first cd i ever bought with my own money. that's how epic that shiii is and not a day goes by that i regret that purchase. i can still to this day listen to that whole album from start to finish, not skip a track and know dang near every word. this chick is my favorite artist. ever. with one solo album to her name. & that's how you know you bad. who else mastered vocals & lyricism, her words strangle my heart & her voice just straight breaks that heaux-- you can't get no better than that. and she does it all with TRUTH. she ain't BS'in NOTHIN bro... nothing. i mean people say she's crazy, she's bipolar, blah blah blah BS BS BS, & im thinkin wtf does it matter? she spits/sangs truth every time she grabs the mic, idgaf what kinda condition she has. yeah cuz we're all completely sane & ain't never had a issue a day in our lives... 

see that's why i effs wit people like her. and my other auntie erykah badu. and my cousin janelle monae. i kick it wit the weird kids man, #NoShame whatsoever... i been tryna tell yall i been crazy since forever anyways. we had lost it waaay before it was cool homie, you betta #WRECKANIZE!

and oh p.s. the whole reason i felt the need to speak on her in this here post is because i heard tell she talmbout gettin back in the studio. NPR got a interview where she talks about being #excited and whatnot about recording again... i almost peed when i heard that, i ain't even gon front kids. & i will purchase that heaux, no questions asked.

God is Love, Rev Run :)

Friday, July 2, 2010

o m g guys we finna roll uo to this open mic spot in downtown and they talmbout throwin a heffa on stage! eeek!
Hmm. let's test this here mobile blogging right quick. 1... 2... testing 1... 2...

late night philosophizing with the homies :)

God knows what you need when you need it. He's so strategic with the people he places in your life... it's ridiculous... I mean I shouldn't be so... amazed because He does stuff like this all the time. But it truly is amazing the seasons He brings you through just to get you to the next checkpoint in life. He brings you through periods of solitude so that you can learn to be alone without being lonely & through it all still trust in Him & Him only. #check. He brings you through periods where the people you call "friends" drain you & leech off of you & mistake your kindness for weakness only to bring you to people who take care of you & appreciate you & with whom you are equally yolked and/or growing in Him. #check.

I just finished having a conversation with two of my closest friends. We talked for hours. And the truths we shared left me feeling so... refreshed! Like I'm literally still sitting here going through all of it in my head & I'm just inserting those gold nugget tidbits into places in my life that were lacking before tonight. I don't even have words for this post, I just knew I needed to scribble something down just so I could have a chance at sleep tonight slash this morning...

We shared a transparency with each other that I can say is truly lacking just... on this planet period. the Realness is gone, the role of being each other's keeper is gone in this world today. In life, we as people go through a lot of so called "friends". So many people slide through our lives who are #disposable-- people who are ACCESSORIES rather than NECESSITIES. People that make you look a little better but the outfit is still just fine without them... wow lol idk if y'all caught that revelation??? Courtney Streat, I love you kid. Really & truly. But I digress lol somewhere along the way we stopped "keeping" each other. See at this point in life anyone that doesn't uplift you is a deadweight liability. All I need is my ride or die keepers and that's it. No offense intended but I need people to look out for me, to keep me in check, to have marathon discussions with me about everything under the sun, to give me the genuine, Godly opinions and truths that I need. And at the same time I need them to allow me to let my hair down, let me laugh, let me act stupid & be goofy & just be myself, uncensored & unbridled. I need relationships that resemble two way streets in that there is a constant exchange between us of love, of give and take, of intellect, of conversation, of thoughts & opinions, of questions & answers.

Ok so I'm rambling lol but I said all this to say two things: we as people, especially black people/ minorities need to go back to keeping each other. We don't love each other anymore and so we don't realize that in fighting each other we're only defeating ourselves. I need intellectual heart to heart dialogue to replace an exchange of bullets & slurs & insult & obscenities. I need truth wrapped in love to replace these lies wrapped in facades, I need us to go back to the day when keeping it real actually meant keeping it real.
And the second reason I wrote this is to reiterate that I truly have found a group of keepers-- genuine necessities in my life that keep me grounded and sane in the midst of this new fakeness epidemic we're so quick to call real. And for these people, I am grateful to God because people like this are not easily found. In fact, I'm convinced that they cannot really be "found", that we must let God place them in our lives in their due season because "even the right thing at the wrong time can by default end up being the wrong thing." Seasons come and go for different reasons and for this one I am truly thankful. So all I can do is bask in this season & glean all that I can so that, should this particular season ever end, I will have nothing but gratitude & thanksgiving towards God for loaning me these priceless gifts. I feel the need to keep the gifts He gives me in the best condition that I can because I never know when they'll be taken from me. And there's nothing more disrespectful than purposely not taking care of somebody else's things. #UhUnh! #RUDE!

#sidnote: this Eric Benet is sooo on it tonight. His voice can most definitely have my children. #thatisall

#shoutout tiiiime!!! I would like to send my utmost hatred to Sam & Courtney for keeping me up this late knowing that they are my muses & that once words are in me, I cannot sleep until they are berthed from me. You heauxs knew such things & then yall did what yall did anyways! So from now on, BOHFUH yall just shut up talkin me so I can friggin go to sleep!

#truth :: I love, yeah I said it! LOVE you guys & I will do all I can to #keep you. As long as yall keep frontin that yall actually like me, that's really all I need :) I would most definitely take a bullet grazing for either of you any day :)

the video for July First

Thursday, July 1, 2010

i been having a lot of weird dreams lately... about people in my past that i've had to cut ties with. but in these dreams, we're just as close as we once were. so obviously questions arise... why am i dreaming of restored relationships when i've already settled myself with the thought things can never be as they once were. & i actually like it that way, i like progress, i like change, i like when things get better, i like when hindsight shows me where i've been & how bad it was for me in comparison to the advancements of now... i mean i guess these dreams could mean something... or they could mean nothing at all... i mean at the end of the day, it was all a dream...